Friday, January 25, 2013

The power of an F-word

 A true story about a four-letter word this moment took place back in1996 during darker days.

It was late afternoon in June when I found myself seated directly in front of two well known partners who would take part in my upcoming self-destruction; a bottle of rum and very sharp knife....
(No worries it all ends happily,.. I am writing the story).I remember having peace with the decision knowing or at least convincing myself  that I had tried the best in my life and failed; concluding this at the ripe old age of 23. This was not the first time that self-destruction had crossed my mind it had reared its head many times in childhood, I ran away from home to avoid it but now, I mean then I was tired of running.

My heart feared my misguided courage, I truly wanted to complete the present task at hand, to do something right finally, I was determined. I cracked opened the mickey of rum and drank a mouth full of it, it was at that moment when I heard the door bell coming from downstairs from the front door of the shared house I was renting.  I was not going to be distracted I thought then I continued to put the bottle down with one hand while picking up the knife in the other hand.Thinking all the while that I had to do it right so It could  not be fixed, then the door bell rang again.

It was at that moment spirit took over body and for a reason I am not quite sure of I put on my old raggedy white terry cloth robe. Then went down stairs to answered the door. A women dressed in pink from head to toe stood at my door staring at me. Her presence was only for a moment and she said only a few words which were”Do you go to church?”
I replied abruptly“No!” then she smiled at me.
I then proceed to close the door when she began to move further into my door way. The lady in pink took my right hand and held it gently and said ”Sona, my name is Faith do you understand me?”

I was still, my heart felt as if it had stopped beating. How did she know my name? I thought as I slowly nodded my head "yes". She smiled again at me then the lady in pink turned around and walked away. I soon quickly closed door and began to cry not truly understanding what had truly happened.  But I did know that the mere hearing of the word Faith…had  changed the direction of my life

A message to simply have Faith came knocking at my door in my darkest days and it was a blessing that I had answered it. A journey of Faith is  a process and in my opinion there is no overnight Faith. Many times after that moment my Faith waned I am ashamed to say but, now my response is different to life's darkness. I have learned that Faith is never giving up and it is certainly not a simple four-letter word that should garner disbelief or to be made simple. But a word that holds power if rooted in God, it will get you where you need to be.
 It is a powerful F-word that should be used more liberally in our lives in how we view each other and ourselves and our ability to change and achieve.

Please view my video with original word song and art.
My children's story page about "Silva" with a yummy recipe and fun arts and craft.
Grandma's inspired wisdom.

 God Bless Everyone.

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